messy heart.

I am not taking credit for the topic of this post, as it is inspired by something I read in my Bible’s notes a long time ago, but I definitely did want to pass it on to whomever may read this.

The purpose of pain in the human body is to let us know something is wrong. While all of us have heard hyped-up exercise junkies say “feel the burn,” (and i’m sure all of us have seen high school football players wear t-shirts that say “pain is weakness leaving the body”), the truth is that God made our bodies with such precision and intricacy that every sensation has a purpose. And the feeling of pain is our body’s alarm system. This is good. Imagine if you couldn’t feel if someone was sawing off your arm in your sleep or if you were walking around on a broken ankle. Pain lets us know that we are alive. Pain lets us know exactly which area of our body needs care and attention. Numbness in our bodies can be dangerous.

The same is true spiritually. I know so many people that are so frustrated with their struggles. They are fighting for peace, fighting for stability, for purity, even fighting for sanity. Sometimes they see their struggles as a sign that God isn’t listening, or that He has somehow failed on His promise to grow and prosper us. I think the opposite is true. If we never feel spiritual growing pains— if we never feel the internal battle to serve the Holy Spirit instead of our fleshly desires— then we should be wary that we may not even know Him at all. If you think being a Christian is easy, I urge you to get on your face before the Lord and beg for conviction. If our souls are numb to danger, or don’t feel the other-worldly pressure pulling and stretching us to make constant decisions for the good or the bad, we’re being tricked.

Let’s think of a soldier. A warrior has heightened senses. They have beaten their bodies into submission and they have become experts in defeating the enemy. That is their sole purpose. Isn’t it our job to be soldiers for Christ? And what is our enemy? NOT people who don’t share our beliefs. Our enemy is sin. Yes, Satan is the encourager and purpetrator of sin, but he can’t shove it upon us. If we are in Christ, Satan has no power over us, other than yelling lies into our ears at all times. He cannot MAKE us sin. John Piper once said, ‘my biggest enemy is not Satan. My biggest enemy is John Piper, and he’s the only reason I’d ever go to hell.’ I think that we have become numb to the severity of our sin. Yes, the Gospel makes it known that it is by the GRACE OF GOD that we are saved, and that EVERYBODY is offered the saving grace of God, and that NOTHING can separate us from the love of God— no mistake, no lifestyle, no bad decision— but it also says that once we are saved, we die to sin (Galatians 2:20). We live only to love God and love people. We are no longer to be agents of destruction. Only to be vessels of the HOLY, FIERY LOVE OF CHRIST. The scariest part about this responsibility to me is how automatically my heart reverts back to sinful ways. As many parents could verify, you don’t have to teach a toddler to be selfish. That’s the automatic setting of our hearts. We need the constant help of Jesus to keep us from falling back into sin. This is why religion will never work. If our lives are about what good stuff we can do then we are setting our own morality above the commands of Christ. I must admit, I fall into this sin so often. I think I’m offering something beautiful to God when in reality I’m blaspheming against His name. If my actions are in the name of Giana-being-a-good-person instead of in the name of Christ, then I am NOT glorifying anybody. If anything, I’m driving people away from Jesus. No one likes a religious person. Jesus didn’t like them either.

All of this goes back to the idea of pain, because the chances are, if I’m finding my walk with Christ to be painless and easy, I have probably become numb to the fact that I’m walking in sin. We should not be afraid of, or discouraged by, pain. Even intense pain. Because God will not waste our pain, and He has even given us the grace of ringing the spiritual alarm in our hearts anytime we’re ignoring a problem in there. If nothing else comforts you, meditate on what the Bible says about our King Jesus: “for we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet was without sin.” Hebrews 4:15.